In order for us to experience the abundant life more fully, be in good health and live an overcoming life; not only do we have to have a right relationship with God and with each other but we must have a right relationship with ourselves. Jesus said in Matthew 22:37-40, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all soul, and with all you mind and your neighbor as yourself. This is the great and foremost commandment. And a second is like it, You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets."
In order for us to love others we must first be able to love ourselves. Not with a prideful, arrogant kind of love but with God's love and valuation of us. The way we love others will reflect how we love ourselves. The biggest hindrance to us loving ourselves is an "unloving spirit".
An "unloving spirit" is an evil spirit that masquerades in us as us. It is the familiar spirit of the parent most like you. One way it is allowed into a person's life is through our believing the lie that we are the source of the negative thoughts we are having about ourselves.
An "unloving spirit" is a spirit of anti-christ because it contradicts what God's Word says about you. God says, "We are fearfully and wonderfully made"; "We are His work-manship created in Christ Jesus unto good works"; "We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us"; "We always triumph in Jesus name"; "We are more than conquerors through Him who loved us"; "We are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus..." An "unloving spirit" tells us the opposite is true.
An "unloving spirit" works in you to attack you and others like you. It leads you to curse yourself and others which causes you to be clothed with a garment of cursing and a belt of cursing. Psalms 109:17-19 says, "He also loved cursing, so it came to him; and he did not delight in blessing so it was far from him. But he clothed himself with cursing as with a garment, and it (cursing) entered into his body (bowels) like water and like oil (poison/bitterness) into his bones."
An "unloving spirit" contradicts what God says about you; It accuses you and you always come up short and guilty. It tears down in you what God is trying to build up. It deceives you into calling evil good and good evil, bitter sweet and sweet bitter (Is. 5:20). It deceives you into arguing with God over the way you were made (Is. 45:9-10). An "unloving spirit" blocks you from giving and receiving love; it leads you to agree with what you think others are seeing in you. It has you believing that if you speak out and agree with what you think others are seeing in you, they will be less ridiculing of you. When you speak out what you think others are seeing about you, its strength is reinforced in you.
An unloving spirit is a lying and deceiving spirit; it is a spirit of hate, murder and unforgiveness of self. It is a spirit of perfectionism (pride and legalism) which causes you to be angry at yourself and depressed when you do not perform as perfectly or look as perfectly as you think you should.
It has been medically proven that people who do not feel good about themselves have low serotonin levels and are addictive types of personalities.
This spirit comes in generationally through the parent most like the child. As a parent, have you ever wondered why you have the hardest time with the child most like you? It is because you see the things in the child that you despise about yourself which gives this spirit free access to work.
The major root to this evil self-hating spirit is through the lack of discipline. Parents are commanded by God to train up their children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord which includes love, nurture, protection, forgiveness, guidance, provision, correction, affection, etc. This is the positive side of discipline. There is only one negative side of discipline and that is to use the rod when a child doesn't receive the need correction.
When a child is not properly disciplined, he does not feel loved; he hates himself; he hates his parents; he feels guilty; he is taught to live after the flesh; he is taught that there are no consequences for his bad behavior; he is taught, he is god, therefore, he has no need for God or fear of God which turns him away from evil. He feels illegitimate because Hebrews 12:8 says, "But if you are without discipline...then you are illegitimate children and not sons."
Instead of turning to God in his pain, he turns to other things (food, alcohol, drugs, sex, performance, work, false personalities, etc.) to cope, comfort himself and to compensate for his feelings of self-hatred, inadequacy and worthlessness.
Proverbs 22:15 says "Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of discipline will remove it far from him." Proverbs 22:6 says, "Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it." If we are not trained up in the way we should go, we are trained up in the way we should not go which sets a default in our life which can only be broken by Jesus.
It is through proper discipline that a child is taught to feel good about himself. Proverbs 15:32 says, "He who neglects (to reject or overlook as counsel, to become unbridled and lawless) discipline despises (rejects, treats as mean and despicable, slights, neglects, treats as unworthy, disdains and has the lowest opinion of and abhors himself."
The "unloving spirit" will draw others to reject you and treat you like you treat yourself. It can produce in us fear, anxiety, stress (which can destroy the immune system), excessive talkativeness, death, suicide, self-murder, self-hatred, self-bitterness, self-blame, self-condemnation, self-contempt, self-rejection, inferiority, torment, fear of failure, fear of rejection, misery, auto-immune diseases (where the body attacks the body), compulsive confessions, self-comparison, shame, embarrassment, self-consciousness, defeatist attitude, giving up and giving in, hopelessness to change, depression, fabricated personalities, self-pity, false responsibility, giving up and giving in, guilt, false comfort in other things besides God.
To get rid of this evil spirit, you must: 1. submit to God¹s discipline. 2. forgive your parents for not loving you enough to discipline you. 3. repent of your rebellion and refusal of discipline, if it was offered. 4. forgive your parents for their lack of affirmation. 5. recognize the "unloving spirit" for what it is an evil anti-christ spirit. 6. forgive yourself. 7. repent of self-rejection and accept yourself. 8. repent of anger, bitterness, and hatred towards yourself. 9. break generational curses. 10. separate yourself from it. 11. break soul ties with it and with the parent most like you. 12. refuse to let it work in you and tell it to go in Jesus name (Jas. 4:7).
In Psalms 139:13, it says "For Thou didst form my inward parts, Thou didst weave me in my mother¹s womb. I will give thanks to Thee for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; wonderful are Thy works, and my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from Thee, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth. Thine eyes have seen my unformed substance; and in Thy Book they were all written, the days that were ordained for me, when as yet there was not one of them. How precious also are Thy thoughts to me, O God! How vast is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would outnumber the sand. When I awake, I am still with Thee." You are the apple of God's eye. He loves you!
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